Father's Heart

My colleague, who's in 40s said his daughter didn't come back home for the past 2 days. I asked if he happen to scold his daughter and he said he didn't even get a chance to do so since he is very tired after work.

He is really mad at her daughter and in my mind he must've hate his daughter. But that perception changed when he refused to eat because he is too worried about his daughter.

I think I just broke my toes.

Went for a walk while I'm in the hospital for an appointment. I'm pretty dizzy and i guess it was my blood pressure which is pretty high 178/90.

Walked and walked, then I felt a pain on my toes. I realized it was so painful and looked back I saw this concrete beam. Argh, I just smashed my foot into it.

The pain is so unbearable. When I walked, I could feel the pain. When I sat, it would be tingling. Went to the doctor and she said if after a week it still painful, the toes must be cracked. I mean the toe bone.  

My ex-boyfriend name Welly

I met this man named Welly at my workplace. He is using the old tactic to woo me. Surprisingly, I got attached at this man. We met and talk in the phone often. What I liked about him is the fact that he is the eldest child from 8 siblings. That makes me feel like he would be a responsible person. He also 3 year older than me which is what I want.

We went out on our first date. He picked me up far away from my house. Maybe he is afraid to meet my parents. Everything is going well until I realize his habit. When we talked, his eyes would attached to my boob. Then, he often looked at his phone. This is the thing that annoyed me after the first case.

The day after our first date, we still contact each each other. Then, a week after we just stopped  talking. I think it's over even though we didn't decide on anything yet.

I Used To Be So Passive

Work changed me. My job required me to blend in with the male stuff. Since I'm pretty shy among male, I don't have a male friends since I was in high school and middle school. I don't know how am I going to start the conversation. In the plant, I need to talk a lot. With the population of 9 female and almost 200 male workers. I have to adjust myself. To talk, to give them instruction. I admit it was really tough but I force myself. Back then, I will run from having to talk to the male workers.

Now, I'm able to sit in the same car with them. Now I able to chat with them. How weird. I used to run or avoiding them. I feel great.

Boss oh Boss

Boss said I need to finish up all tasks. I was like;

Really?

When friends said they are pregnant and enjoying it. I was like

My First Date

Got some men asking for my number. Been thinking a lot but then I decided to date this on man from my workplace. I choose him because of his quality as a men.

Then, yesterday we went on a date after been friends for 3 days.

We agreed to met on the afternoon. He came on 1:30PM. I said to myself, It's fine.

We ate, I paid.

It was so awkward. Especially when his eyes on my boobs all the time. It's like my eyes is on my boobs. I thought he is the one after meeting so many bastards in the past judging how he  talked.

The effort I put in to make the relationship a success.

I don't know. Am I giving up on love? I think so. I think I better off with myself. I better date myself more. Love myself more.

Like what?

My kitty baby name Micky

I love you Micky.thank you for your presence. I never expect it could be this hard to say goodbye to you. I didn't cry at all. Maybe because I really want you to go rather than seeing you suffered

It's all started with

The eye contact. I've been looking out for him when I passed his work zone. When he first come to work on the 10th May.He smiled. My heart burst but I pretend to be cool. The next few days we met again. We talked to each other. Just for 5/7minutes. My heart is going to burst.

It stoApped.

Just like that.

On June 8 at 10pm,he asked for my number. I want to jumped off to hug him but I still maintain to be cool. He wrote it on his palm. I wait until the noon he still haven't contact me. In my mind,he might be lost my number while busy working.

4.00pm he asked me whether I'm busy or not. His first message to me.
We started to whatsapp a lot. Asking about each others life.

12am he asked my status. I said I'm single. He right awaysaid that he want to give us a chance. He said if it is okay to be friends first and then if I want him,are could go into the serious path.

To be continued..


*this is my first post with Love tag*

Earthquake in Kota Kinabalu

Today, surprisingly I woke up at 6am despite sleeping really late at 3am. Went to the office to do some pending stuff at 7am,didn't even eat breakfast. I greet my cat. Once I reach the office, one of my colleague is already there.

We heard something on the 3rd floor, then to the 2nd floor and next to the ground floor. It was a weird feeling. The whole wall is cracking, the ground is shaking. We went to the entrance and saw the workers at the canteen is gathering outside the building.

The first thing I have in mind is that I didn't know it was earthquake. I don't have any idea. My head feels dizzy. I was standing up first and then sitting down while thinking I should go under my desk.

Now as the aunties is still talking about it, I'm still having a goose bumps. My spine is cold.  My heart beating irregularly.

Because I kinda like our daily routine

Last week I get my new boss. He's 30 years old.

He pretty puntual. Before 8 am he will always be at the plant.

Today, he went to bintulu. I'm quite sad because I like our routine already.

His spirit. His order.

I'm getting a new boss

Surprised to receive a news that there will be someone who will fill up the SHO post. I don't know what to expect. Should I be happy because I finally getting a boss or should I be sad because I will have no freedom already. It's a mixed feelings.

I really don't know what to expect.

Just going to wait and see how we will progress.

When I saw dog getting hit by a car

On my way to work at 7.30am. Saw 2 dogs lay down side by side. When I looked back the brown dog is bleeding from it's head. I guess the white doggie must be thinking that her friend is sleeping and waiting. So sad. There is 4 more dog who got knocked off by a car.

I'm so sad. Why people couldn't be so considerate.

Perempuan yang berdengkur

So basically I am categorized as one of the perempuan yang berdengkur. Pelik dan lucu. At first I never believe that I actually snoring when I sleep but my sister have record it so she could use it as a prove. I'm surprise. Why? Why saya boleh berdengkur? Even my colleague said she really thought it was the air-conditioner. Haha

Bekal Saya

I'm working in the professional industry. I have my own income whom I receive at the end of the month. One thing that I always wait everyday is my bekal. My mum will prepare a meal bertaraf chef. My mum will cook Ayam Masak Kicap, Vege's, Sambal, Chrysanthemum Tea,etc. Early in the morning. How come.Mum able to prepare the meal so early?

Happiness

Happiness is when I’m so hungry but when I check my drawer there is no food left. What’s left is only a cream cracker plastic because I’m too lazy to throw it away and I think it’s been 2 weeks since I ate it. I want to throw it away but then when I grab the plastic there is a piece left. Yes!

Happiness is when I’m able to help strangers. I tried my best to help them even though I’m so busy with my work.

Happiness is when a guy from my workplace asked for my number. I gave to him. He message me right away. What a gentlemen he is. I found it rare to meet a real gentleman nowadays. The guy who is honest like this caught my attention. I still remember last month I gave a hint to a guy that I liked him. He didn’t do anything. I’m so pissed off. If he doesn’t want me, just say it to my face. Don’t give me hope.

Happiness is when my colleague willing to walked so that they could visit me at my cubic.

Kind Hearted People

Been pretty busy. I never thought working as a Safety and health personnel could be this tough.
Lately my task is to manage the fire extinguisher  where by I have to do inspection on it. Tagging it. For the 3 plants.

Went to the store to change the empty fire extinguisher and change to the new one.

The workers already wrapped the 29 fire extinguisher on the wood plank.

So imagine. I have to walk bringing maximum 2 fire extinguisher at one time. That could be 20KG.

Then the staff look at me and ask if they could help me. Thank God I'm able to finish it up.

Never thought those people still exist.

Emptiness and Loneliness

Being alone is the thing that I hate the most. I felt so lonely and empty now. It's killing me. I know this feeling will subside but going through this now, it's break my heart.

Imagine how close I am with this women called Zura and now she left. After 3 months working together. She's my partner in crime. I'm so sad. There's no words can describe how I felt right now but all I can say is that I feel so empty.

Still remember my boss?

One of the practical trainee is going to end her 3 months duration. Boss asked me where is a great place to eat? I'm like What??So he actually want to show his appreciation towards the trainee and he's going to treat us tomorrow.

In my eyes he is still the Crazy Boss but from today I realized that he have this soft spot in his heart.

Dream

I know I shouldn't believe in dreams. I just want to recall back.
I dreamt of jumping from a high rise building. In the dream, I'm so happy because I finally overcome my fear of height.

Whatever

Tuesday

Mom and I fought about breakfast. Mom cooked instant noodle with an egg. I hate it because the strong smell of the egg. At the end, mum make me a new instant noodle with a fried egg. Mum end up eating the first one.

Dad still talking about the benefits of vitamins. Dad asked me if I could do all the exercise for my new job offer. It's related with Fire Services. I have to be fit enough to pass the fitness test. Dad is surprised when I told him I cant do pumping.

Oh well

My Monday

Good Morning, peeps..

Woke up to the loud bang on my door. Oh,it's Monday and that means I've to go to work. Eat breakfast, talk to mum,dad and bro as well as micky the cat.
Since I don't drive, my dad need to drive me to work as well pick me up. I am too lazy to cook,so my mom have to wake up early in the morning to prepare my breakfast as well as my lunch. Mom have to rush so I could go to the office 7.30am sharp. Love you mum.

On my way to the office, dad keep asking if I already take my supplements with a reminder that Vitamin C should've be taken on empty stomach as it will cause a gastric. My  dad is not a doctor but he's really concern about the family's health.

Arrived at the office 7.41am.Thank you dad for never failed to send me on time each day.

As soon as I arrived on my cubic, I noticed a cup of  coffee that's been on the table since Saturday. Ah, why am I like this? I'm not sure.

Now, I should do my work instead of doing stuff online but here I am. Blogging. Tweeting.

Monday, I don't have Monday blues.

Just gonna go with the flow

Learn to accept things as they come. Not going to waste my time by thinking what could happen in the future.

Whatever happen,will happen as life is unexpected.

For example,

Enduring

It's been 2 months since I start working in this professional line. Never thought I could celebrate my 2 months work anniversary.

The endless work, the independent style where no one guide me, the colleague and etc
I still have so many things to be improve.

I'm trying my best. This is my first professional job. I have to do anything to be strong.

Cheers to the next anniversary

Work Story.Again?

I'm sorry. Been ranting about works lately.
It's because I've spent almost 8 hours in the office.

I hope I could be strong. Strong enough to be able to do work without guidance, to hear all people mocks me(I know I shouldn't care), the bosses with a shitty personality,etc.

I hope I could stay here for a year but with a circumstances like this, I don't know how long I could stay.

The Working Life

I thought life would be so easy once I work but it's not easy at all. From my first day at work. It's freaking me out. The awkward bosses.

I don't know if I could take this level of stress any longer. It's stressful. It's tiring. Too much workload.